To My Ninth Grade Self

To My Ninth Grade Self

I’m so glad you didn’t do it
Let the world drag you down
I know your heart was hurting
Your emotions whirling round

But you made it through
And here we both are
You looking from back then
Me looking from afar

Let me tell you why I’m glad
You sought help when you did
Because you had the strength to fight
When you could’ve cried and hid

Our life right now is great
We’ve gotten our degree
We moved and got a full-time job
I wish that you could see

So thank you for not doing it
Ending it then and their
We would’ve missed out on the summer night
The wind blowing through our hair

And all the different memories
The good ones and the bad
If it had ended then
They’re times we never would’ve had

So one final thanks
From older me to you
I’m glad that you were resilient
I’m glad that we got through

 

This beautiful, reflective poem comes from Becca W., and we are so happy to share it with you all. Please give some love to Becca in the comments!

Always remember you are not alone.

You are loved.

Sandra

Want to submit to this site and share your story, art, or article related to mental health? Email wemustbebroken@gmail.com

Follow us for more posts, inspiration and art on Facebook, Twitter, Tumblr, and Instagram.

dear hope Thoughts An Anonymous Diary: Poems Prose Lyrics and More

A poetry selection

Bleeding Art

I need to visit Darkness
and feel insane
To feel the sadness
and blame
I need to spend my age
In a painful world
To fill my pages
With words
Make me sink Sweetheart
and let me bleed art
Make me feel wrong or
right
Then leave me with something
to write.

 

 

Too Dark For You

Sorry
I’ve never been enough
I’m too dark for you
I’m too hard to be understood
I never should have told you
I never should have let you see inside

You always shine
So brightly
With your beautiful
Smile.

Just like the Sun

But I’m always alone
So sad
With my ugly
Sadness

Just drowning in the Dark.

 

 

Addiction

I remember once
You said “I can’t live without you”
That’s funny how it changed to
“I really want to leave you”
But don’t be sad my love
You will find someone better
And pain is watching me from above
ready to jump on me like an animal
But don’t take it seriously
It’s natural
and sadness became a part of me
like an endless need
like an addiction
But my heart will always bleed
Without your affection.

 

 

Cure

Darling, I’ve never loved solitude
Honestly no one does

So please allow me to serve you
Or set me free

Please
Break these chains of loneliness
I’m tired of slowly sinking alone

Splash new colors on my life
I’m tired of black

Make me feel new feelings
I’m tired of my emptiness

Show me how to spread my wings
I’m tired of running away from my demons

Take my hand and show me how to write
New words, words that I’ve never written

Show me new sounds that I’ve never heard
I’ve been a deaf for a long time

Show me how to open these doors
I really tried but I couldn’t

Please
Be my flower and I will be your Bee
I will get my resources from you

Be my sun and make me forget
The taste of Darkness

But do I deserve your cure?

 

 

This selection of poetry was written by Mashiro, a talented poet who we feel so lucky to feature on our site. You can find some more from Mashiro on his Tumblr and his Deviant Art. Feel free to give some love to Mashiro in the comments!

Always remember you are not alone.

You are loved.

Sandra

Want to submit to this site and share your story, art, or article related to mental health? Email wemustbebroken@gmail.com

Follow us for more posts, inspiration and art on Facebook, Twitter, Tumblr, and Instagram.

dear hope poetry Thoughts An Anonymous Diary: Poems Prose Lyrics and More

Inner Demons

**Trigger Warning** This story has graphic and disturbing content and discusses severe depression.

 

“I’m not crazy. I’m not crazy.” Josh rocked back and forth, digging his fists into his sandy blond hair.

I felt my back pocket vibrate and took my phone out. “Ryan? Yeah, I found him.”

“Oh, thank God! Is he alright?” Ryan asked.

I looked back to Josh. He was still shaking and rocking, still saying, “I’m not crazy. I’m not crazy.”

“He’s alive,” I said.

“Where are you guys?” Ryan asked.

I took a deep breath. I shivered as I saw my breath turn into a puff of condensation because of the frigid winter air. I turned around and tried to make out what I could with the moon as my only flashlight. “I don’t know. It’s hard to see. We’re outside. I think I can make out a swing set in the distance. There is a playground right next to it…” I twirled around. “We’re in some clearing. I think. There are trees all around us…”

“That could be anywhere. Okay, hold on. I might be able to track your location from your phone.”

I shook my head. “Ryan, how the hell―”

“Don’t ask. I have my ways. Just sit tight and stay with him. Make sure he doesn’t go anywhere. I’ll be there soon.”

Creative Pieces dear hope

The Insecurity Project

The idea for my insecurity project stemmed from my realization that most people have something they are insecure about, and that attention being drawn to a personal insecurity for fear of being judged is nothing more than a thought that is hyped up by anxiety. These insecurities can have a large impact on self-esteem and confidence.

I asked my friends to open up to me about what they were most insecure about and happened to find the courage to do so myself. I found that through photography I could capture and highlight these anxieties by pushing comfort levels. I hoped to (1) boost their own confidence and (2) comfort others who may feel the same way.

I have had trouble throughout my teenage years and into my young adult life with self-esteem, spending nights staring at myself until I’m at the brink of tears and want to smash the mirror. Though the project has been slow to get rolling, I hope to inspire at least a couple souls to begin their journey towards self-love and care.

~~~

Emily was self-conscious of her teeth and had trouble smiling. If she found herself smiling with her teeth, she felt that people were just looking at her teeth. She has since found confidence and smiles without any self-doubt.

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Emily
Insecure about her smile

A Lens Into Our World dear hope

Internalization

**Trigger Warning: One of the images depicts blood.**

 

The central idea of my concentration is the expression of the concept of internalization through visual imagery. Under the term internalization, I focused mostly on aspects of life such as mental disorders, personal identity, and trauma. While these can not always be seen outwardly, they are nonetheless pivotally important aspects of life.

I was fascinated with the idea of using abstract elements fused with more realistic ones in order to explore this conceptual theme.

 

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Suspension

A Lens Into Our World dear hope

Familiarity

Familiarity

 

sadness is like a cold hug.

familiar,

yet uncomfortable.

 

it is tears running down your face

and you haven’t been able to smile in 24 hours.

 

it is laying in bed until you have to get out

and even then,

maybe you don’t get up.

 

it is wearing sweatpants because you don’t care enough

to look nicer.

 

it is listening to sad music on repeat

it is the only thing you can relate to.

 

it is feeling like you are alone

in a room full of people who love you

 

it is feeling lonely

at 10:30 in the morning

because the only thing that has hugged you in the past 24 hours

is your blanket.

 

R.E.

 

 

Thank you to community member R.E. for sharing poetry with us once again. You can read R.E.’s previous piece here. You can also find R.E. on Tumblr.

Always remember you are not alone.

You are loved.

Sandra

 

Want to submit to this site and share your story, art, or article related to mental health? Email wemustbebroken@gmail.com

Follow us for more posts, inspiration and art on Facebook, Twitter, Tumblr, and Instagram.

 

 

Creative Pieces dear hope

Dysphoria and Self-Image: an artist’s depiction of struggle and recovery

My name is Claire Frederick. I’m an incoming senior in Painting at Maine College of Art (MECA) in Portland, ME. I live in the city with my cat, Glitter, who is my therapy kitty. I have clinical and seasonal depression, an anxiety disorder, sleep issues, and am a recovered self harmer and anorexic.

2017-06-05

Claire Frederick

I have always been someone that tries to handle my mental health on my own; even at my lowest lows I have refused outside help. It wasn’t until I was outside the United States (Italy and Greece) in my worst manic depressive and anxious episode that I realized I needed support from professionals and medication. It was more than situational; it was chemical. It took multiple tries to find the pills that worked for me, but I found them.

Presently, I still have my days, but I am the strongest and happiest I have ever been. As an artist with mental illness and queer identity, it is my mission to spread awareness through visual art by both personal and relatable imagery. To me, it is important for people to understand the vast diversity that mental illness takes form, and that most times it’s not “standard.” Even with all of its idiosyncratic identities, there are others out there that feel like you.

Talking to friends, family, strangers, and or professionals can be so beneficial to find peace of mind. Literally. There are people that want to help and support you, as well as, well as ways to find personal positivity and release the negative. For me, finding an outlet and profession in visual art has saved my life. I am also forever grateful for my support system: my family, girlfriend, friends, and professionals. We all have a reason to believe, to keep moving forward; it’s always out there.

Dysphoria Titlecard

“Disphoria” Artist Statement: The use of line in the exploration of the female figure formally investigates the structure and planar shifts of the body. These lines are formulated in an almost topographical way, and are treated with translucent waves of desaturated color. The earthy, yet bruise-like palette alludes to nature in the same way the body becomes geography. By using wet-on-wet techniques, the paint creates its own forms; the pen is then used to take back control, separating the values and hues. Steering away from the composure of traditional portraiture, I repeat, deconstruct, and reinvent the female figure to achieve an emotional and psychological experience, mimicking feelings of dysphoria associated with my mental illness.

 

Tired Girls Club

Tired Girls Club
Watercolor on 300lb paper
2016

 

Ghost- Deconstruction of the Hand.jpg

Ghost:
Deconstruction of the Hand
Watercolor on 300lb paper
2016

A Lens Into Our World Artwork dear hope