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Consumed (Anxiety): A Behind The Scenes Look At The Next Series

The Consumed project continued the other night with the focus this time being on Anxiety.

We worked for 6 hours as a team to bring to life and personify what anxiety would feel like as an external factor instead of an internal factor. I’m so proud of the team and effort and passion everyone involved brought. I couldn’t have done it without them. But while I’m working on the photos post shoot I thought I would share some of the behind the scenes photos taken. Take a look in the slideshow below.

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Find more of the consumed project here. And be on the lookout for more projects and updates as the fall continues.

PF

A Lens Into Our World Consumed
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Dear Hope Is Expanding, Meet The New Editor!

Hello Everyone,

It seems as my life continues to get more busy and complicated the website is continuing right alongside doing the same. In the last six months we’ve gained a lot of momentum and created a community that is engaging, empathetic, understanding, and willing to hear and learn from each other. It makes me proud looking at what we’ve accomplished so far.

So I want to keep going.

10176116_10206246596547066_7865623685647307170_nBesides community submitted pieces you deserve to read different news and articles about what is going on in the world today about mental health and your well being. I have to decided to bring on another editor to the site who will help me in finding and publishing content to keep the ecosystem alive and breathing, and he is someone I know very well.

Meet Danny. (Pictured on the far left next to me)

Danny and I have known each other for 4 years and currently live in the same apartment during our last year at the college we are attending. Danny is as passionate and driven to advocate for mental health (among many other things) and will be a great addition to helping us destigmatize and educate those who are willing to listen.

Danny has already submitted to the site twice with his own “Coping: This is Who We Are“ story and a piece of poetry he wrote entitled “Arachnophilic“. Be sure to check them out and give him some love.

I hope you all welcome Danny with an open mind as a new voice enters this world we share, and look forward to hearing a piece from him over the next week! If you’ve been thinking about submitting to the website now is a good time as well, as we only have a few submissions left in the queue. Share with your friends and invite them to share their stories, because as the community grows, the understanding of these illnesses does in unison.

You are loved.

PF

Want to submit to this site and share your story, art, or article related to mental health or mental illness? Email wemustbebroken@gmail.com

dear hope Uncategorized
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A (Big) Milestone: An Update From The Author

Hello everyone!

I apologize if things have seemed quiet as of late, I’ve been recovering from a surgery I had done on my dominate hand and have recently started my final year at my university. But I have some great news.

We have hit over 10,000 views on Dear Hope. 

WMMB2

Ten THOUSAND views in a little over half a year. If you had told me this was going to happen back in February I would have never believed you.

dear hope Uncategorized
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Mental Suicide

I brought my imbalances
And own self perception
Humidity brought the rain
And passion brought the drought

But that absence brought a thirst
That could no longer be felt
So belief is a word I have trouble believing
And the light in the dark I have trouble seeing

It’s always a cycle

I have trouble remembering what happened between hello and goodbye
The words that were oxygen became living parasites
We share our minds like we share our hearts
And my sleeve is stained while my head is apart

Body, mind, and soul all sold
For temporary calmness, distorted tranquility
By trains that run on a track they are stuck too
With power and potential, but only one way to go

Are you still the one you wanted to be?
The one you said would never change?
Am I the one I said I would be?
Or the one who got blurred out on paper lines

Believe me when I say
I don’t know what to say

The bulbs break and shut off
Maps of neurons start getting crossed out
What part of your mind are you trying to hide
What part of you has committed mental suicide?
PF

Want to submit to this site and share your story, art, or article related to mental health or mental illness? Email wemustbebroken@gmail.com

Creative Pieces dear hope
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Arachnophilic

The lock slid into place,
and the sun was no more.
The world around me had fled;
every had neuron wilted until dead.

The spiders wove a message-
the greatest self-loathing to date.
The sun shined,
but the flowers would not meditate.

I sat near the cobwebs
as they feigned an adorned attention.
(The snow and the sun
knew nothing of this.)

An absolute exhaustion,
but I answered my own question.
I arose with determination-
some arbitrary motivation.

The world was not so cold.
An imaginary exit sign
had been covered by mold.
My fingertips searched
for a euphoric nowhere,
but the doorknob was no longer there.

This post is a submission from Danny who wrote a Coping piece earlier this year for Dear Hope. Find his poetry page here to hear his intricate and detailed thoughts and creations.

Want to submit to this site and share your story, art, or article related to mental health or mental illness? Email wemustbebroken@gmail.com

Creative Pieces dear hope
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Outlooks

I used to be convinced I knew it all
In a world that’s only meant for the same
I used to think it was all in my head
But there’s two sides to me, and one’s always dead

I play those games, I’d play that song
Waiting for someone to just come along
And show everyone’s not like me
Stuck on a train that no one can see

No one can see

It hurts to know, hurts to know everyone changes
And secretly judges like me
It hurts to know time waits for no one
Moving to the rhythm we march to the end

I’m falling for no one
I believe in nothing
No hopes, No dreams
Leaves me lost at sea

PF

Want to submit to this site and share your story, art, or article related to mental health or mental illness? Email wemustbebroken@gmail.com

Creative Pieces dear hope
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Silence

These thoughts running through my head
Contemplating life and death
So much noise, so much doubt
I’m afraid not even the darkness can figure this one out
I’m gonna build a little shelter here
And call it my home
Away from the wolves, away from the storm
This will be the last you hear, this will be the last you see
Of this torn asunder soul
I’ll burn down the bridges and call the ashes home
I’m a hungry heart with a loaded gun
Too tempted to shy away from the morning sun
I feel these eyes calling me home
But home is not where you are
Oh God, Where are you?
I’m finding it difficult to breathe under these heavy stares
Dear God what’s it going to take to make you care?
I’m burning, Im breathing, Im dying
I can’t seem to find my way out
Oh God…Where are you now?
–
This poem is submitted by Matthew Malin. For more discussion on mental health and what it’s like to be inside his head, check out his blog “Confessions” here.
Always remember you are not alone.
You are loved.
PF
Want to submit to this site and share your story, art, or article related to mental health or mental illness? Email wemustbebroken@gmail.com
Creative Pieces dear hope
— 27 Comments

An Emotional Letter From A Bipolar Mother To Her Children

To my children,

I know our lives haven’t gone as you wished. Early in your lives you found out your mother had BiPolar Disorder. A mental disorder that you were too young to understand at that time. I didn’t even understand it at first. I was just a young child when it surfaced.

I lived this way all my life and it was a lot milder so you weren’t subjected to a lot of craziness you didn’t understand. I thank God that he waited until you were old enough before things started getting really messy and your understanding and help was needed.

I know you needed a mom who was there for you through thick and thin and I did my best to be that person. It wasn’t easy. I had to put aside the feelings inside of me, my dear children, in order to help you grow up and into productive adults. Unlike your mother who suffers constantly from Bipolar Disorder.

I feel that I wasted my life because I couldn’t cope with a regular life. I didn’t go for my dreams, too scared. I didn’t make you my priorities like some moms because I was taking care of myself. I was falling apart little by little.

I do my best to attend family get togethers even if I am not feeling up to it and would rather isolate in my bedroom. I love that you guys try to get me out of the house and into doing something with you and my well-loved grandchildren. Believe me I love you all even if sometimes it doesn’t seem that way since I am nurturing myself.

I know some of you do not understand mental health, but I also know that you love me and wouldn’t leave me to struggle alone if I needed up. You guys are there for me when needed.

And I want to make you a promise. I promise to never, ever try to take my life again. I saw the terrible hurt and pain in your faces and the tears and I can’t do that to you. I promise to seek help if ever I feel that way again.

Thank you very much for being my beloved children, I love each and everyone of you.

Love,

Your Mom

This submission comes from Tessa who also runs an amazing blog on advocating for mental illnesses, be sure to check her out.

Always remember you are not alone.

You are loved.

PF

Want to submit to this site and share your story, art, or article related to mental health or mental illness? Email wemustbebroken@gmail.com

Thoughts An Anonymous Diary: Poems Prose Lyrics and More
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Coping: This is Who We Are – Entry 7 “Surviving The Specter”

TRIGGER WARNING: This post is a transparent account of my life with clinical depression and suicide. If this is a trigger for you, please do not read it at this time.

This piece comes from my great friend, Chris, who I have made acquaintances through this website. This piece is one of the best submissions I’ve ever had. and is incredibly powerful and insightful. Lengthy, as many of the coping pieces are, but ultimately moving.

My History

My name is Chris and I’ve survived with severe depression for about 30 years.

Last year I hanged myself.

.Screen Shot 2015-07-28 at 5.21.43 PM

I was diagnosed with clinical depression several years ago.

Not the kind that makes you feel sad after your girlfriend breaks up with you, or explains why you feel under the weather when the weather is under.

No, this is much blacker than that.

Coping: This Is Who We Are dear hope
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What If Depression Was Shown On The Outside?

IMG_3136Ethan Final Form Print

Would we still try to fight it alone?

These were the first shots done in May for my “Consumed” photo project that I’ll be picking up again in September. I’ll be branching out to show different illnesses with different body art in the form of 20 new photos.

What if mental illness was shown on the outside instead of the inside? Would we still try to fight it alone?

Copyright Paul M. Falcone

A Lens Into Our World Consumed dear hope